Hello and Happy New Year!!!
As I talked about in my previous post, I’ve been away on business leading right up to the holidays. I was home in time to finish up my Christmas shopping last minute and enjoy the Holidays with my family and friends back home.
Getting away from my home town and taking on a new city on my own was an awesome experience. I’ve got a nice routine that keeps me productive and keeps me moving forward at home, but getting away from the familiar for awhile really helped me to grow in a lot of ways.
I was basically alone in a big city with no social circle, no friends or family and I couldn’t even talk on my cell phone without accepting ridiculous roaming charges. So there I was, in the middle of an awesome city, traveling on the companies dime left to go out and make the best of the experience.
I worked long days that started early in the morning and went late into the evening. Typically I would have time to grab dinner and do a little exploring, or site seeing each night. I caught a few hockey games, checked out the CN Tower, went ice skating outside on the waterfront, explored Yorkville, the distillery district, the Eaton Center, Dundas Square, all of the nicest restaurant Toronto had to offer, and tried to make the best of my time up there.
Being able to learn a new city, make myself at home in a new environment, push the limits of what I can handle as far as difficulty and volume of work goes, and meet a lot of great people instilled a deep sense of self-confidence and self reliance that I haven’t experience before. I came home feeling like I could handle anything my routine life here could throw at me.
But as beneficial as this experience was, it also disrupted a lot of things I had going on back home. Traveling and being away from home really messed up my workout routine and my diet. I was putting so much energy into work that I didn’t have it in me to hit the hotel fitness center very often. And living out of a hotel with a $100 a day food budget didn’t encourage the best eating habits. Nothing my metabolism can’t handle. I actually dropped 10 pounds from not lifting weights and from all the stress at work.
Now that I’m back, I’ve realized that it’s difficult to get the momentum back on all the things I used to just do routinely. Getting back in the gym was a struggle and seeing how far back I’ve fallen over the past month is frustrating. I used to eat clean out of habit, now I’ve developed a habit of eating out all the time and it’s been surprisingly difficult to go back to eating the right way.
I’ve gotten away from reading until just tonight actually. As you can tell, I haven’t posted anything on this blog in weeks. Work continues to be stressful as I’ve now migrated new responsibilities back to my home office and have no one there to support me. But stay with me; I’m going somewhere with this. It’s a new year and things have been chaotic just in time for me to put them in order and start 2012 fresh.
I want to talk about resolutions, which is just a seasonal term for what are more commonly known as goals. I’ve kept a set of written goals for the past 2 and a half years. These goals are constantly growing and evolving as time goes by and as I reach them.
This year, some of the most important things I want to accomplish are to take this blog to the next level. Which involves writing more consistently. Gaining more exposure through search engine optimization, pay per click advertising, google ads, social media, and hopefully word of mouth. If you get something out of this please share it with a few friends.
Additionally, this year I’m going to be in the best shape I’ve ever been in and finally reach a long term goal of weighing 220 lbs. I started weight lifting 4 and a half years ago. When I first walked into the gym I was 6’4, 150 lbs. Over the past few years I’ve reached a lean 210, (currently at 200 after dropping weight from being away).
Reading is important. I need to reestablish this habit and take in as much useful information as I can this year. I also need to make more money and be creative to maximize this increase. Managing my money, balancing saving and paying off debt is also up there on the agenda. I’d like to share my goals with you so you can see exactly what I’ve put together and use it as an example if you’d like. I’ve kept these somewhat personal and actually haven’t showed them to anyone so enjoy being the first to see:
Perseverance – continued steady belief or efforts, without regard to discouragement, opposition or previous failure; persistence
Decisions are the definition of your life. The present is the time frame that you’re most alive.
- Begin each day by reading these goals and reminding yourself of the direction you want to move in. Realign your desires to focus in on what you need to accomplish.
- Be consistent in working towards everything you want. Forget about bench mark goals and focus strictly on consistency. If you can achieve consistency then all other goals will take care of themselves. Use bench mark goals as something that’s measurable and you can aim for in the short run
- Get to the gym 4 days a week, set a schedule a head of time and stick to it
- Make sure to focus on all muscle groups leaving none behind. This includes abs, forearms, legs and YOUR HEART. Cardio needs to be a consistent part of your routine
- Reach 220 lbs while maintaining low body fat percentage
- Keep your workouts dynamic and diverse. Change your work outs continuously every month. Do different exercises, weights and reps, at different speeds. Create muscle confusion and force your body to adapt to a variety of circumstances and stresses. Use post failure tactics to break plateaus
- Bench 300 lbs
- Pay attention to form. Make sure everything is symmetric, balanced and proper.
- Focus your thoughts on what you want to achieve, how you’ll feel when you achieve those things and all the reasons why you are willing to invest the finite invaluable resource of time and energy into these accomplishments as fuel to stay motivated
- Minimize alcohol consumption to a maximum of 3 drinks per sitting, 2 nights a week
- Improve your diet, eat at home at least 2 out of 3 meals a day, learn to cook and pack a lunch.
- Eat whole foods, complex carbs, lean meats, low saturated fat content, vegetables, high protein diet, vitamins, minerals, digestive enzymes, water
- Prepare meals consisting of chicken, turkey, salmon, potatoes, green beans, spinach, carrots, fruits, brown rice, etc
- Start playing drums daily and learn new technique, watch DVDs, buy books, incorporate this into your daily routine, even if it’s only for a few minutes
- Acknowledge all fears by being conscious of your emotions and mental state, then immediately confront them
- Use visualization to help with success. Relax and see yourself how you would like to be, accomplishing the things you want to accomplish. Mentally rehearse different situations and circumstances in your head so when the opportunity comes you are prepared
- Stay organized and take action immediately, do not procrastinate; delay gratification
- Stay Positive; make a conscious effort to start your day off thinking positive thoughts
- Maintain an internal locus of control and an internally validated reality based on a belief in yourself. This is your reality, start acting like it and taking ownership of it
- Acknowledge negative emotions and respond with assertiveness and courage
- Train your subconscious mind to realize that it doesn’t matter if you get the approval of someone you’re talking to ever, no matter how highly you value their opinion
- Read daily
- Deep identity level change. Keep a focus on evolving and moving forward. Gradually weed out your lesser characteristics and the traits you can’t stand about yourself and shed those layers until you reach the core of who you are and who you’ve always wanted to be
- Develop personality and social skills proactively. Consciously make an effort to improve on this every day by being outgoing, offering value and getting out of your head. It will take time and experience. Don’t ever get comfortable with your progress, there is always work to be done
- Develop a sense of humor as a way of connecting with people. Take all those routine interactions and break the pattern with something out of the ordinary and funny. Do something to stand out, make a connection and be memorable.
- Work on being a better friend, make effort to develop friendships by being present at all times when your with other people
- Stay disciplined in all that you choose to make part of your life, but don’t lose your intent in the repetition of the routine. Make sure you clearly focus on where you’re going and why you spend your time doing the things you choose to do.
- Continue to read and watch seminars in your free time
- Use self psychoanalysis to uncover the roots of problems, then change
- At all times there is a core belief running in the background about yourself. (I am…) make sure it’s always positive
- Become detached from the outcome, do not care what anyone thinks of you, step up, do things for personal enjoyment, do not apologize for anything, and do not try to change to please anyone.
- Learn that you don’t need anyone else’s approval or acceptance. At the end of the day if you’re not on your journey for you, for your own reasons and for what it does for your life then its’ all BS.
- Embrace failure, learn from it, you must practice and fail to get better. Failure is necessary and ironically enough, more knowledge and wisdom is gained in failure than success in most cases. I will regularly fail and welcome it. My ego is unaffected in this practice.
- Fear, the worst of all enemies, can be effectively cured by forced repetition of acts of courage.
- Fear begins with indecisiveness; doubt gets mixed in to create fear. Do not allow these negative thoughts to occur inside your head. Always be positive, have no worries and expect greatness out of life. Thoughts are impulses that materialize into their physical form. You must stay positive to obtain happiness
- Seek out more life experience in all areas. You need to alter your perception and learn from first hand experiences in new situations. By repeatedly putting yourself in new situations, new environments and interacting with new people you will develop a better understanding and skill set of how to achieve any desired outcome in any situation.
- Work on being positive and staying rooted in an empowering set of beliefs with great anticipated responses from everyone, in all aspects, creating constructive self fulfilling prophecies. Be positive, view things and people positively and walk through the world with ease, knowing that it is essentially a light and easy place. Be happy and carefree, with an absolute conviction that you are as great as you know yourself to be and that people would be crazy not to love, admire, and want to get to know you.
- Learn to find fulfillment in the process of improvement itself.
- Seek out ideal career opportunities and locations
- Find alternative ways of generating income – Stock Market, investments, commodities, real estate, start a business, write, internet marketing, info marketing
- Take risks, do what you want to do and forget about money
- Find properties where the rental income will cover the mortgage, purchase them and allow this rental income to build equity for you on its own
- Start saving at least 10% of your pay every pay period
- Stop constantly spending money like an idiot on food and alcohol
- Begin to understand and focus in on your purpose finding greater depth and a clearer perception
- Figure out what it would take for a job to be totally fulfilling and move towards making that into a reality
- DO NOT settle for your current position and current income if it isn’t totally fulfilling. Your career is business and no matter what the circumstances are you have to do what’s best for you and never settle or become complacent. Keep searching until you find a way to provide for yourself and generate income while gaining gratification and fulfillment through your offering of value.
- Develop more specific career goals as purpose comes into focus
- Develop ideas for your own business. Take time to brainstorm and write down these ideas. If something seems reasonable take it a step farther.
- Purchase your own home and use it as a source of rental income
- Purpose: To live life to the fullest and to create the greatest life experience humanly possible. To be the best at all I do, and give my best to everything I’m involved with. To accumulate knowledge, experience, social connections, wealth and power to share and contribute to others.
- Love yourself and constantly remind yourself of it
- Be forgiving of yourself
- Respect yourself and refuse to accept second rate behavior from yourself or others
- Believe in yourself and keep a positive mental state to stay empowered and energized
- Be loving to others always. It’s too easy to fall into old patterns and routines that do not support the kind of life you ideally want to live. Stay present and work on making this unconsciously competent
- Be more enthusiastic; fuel your desire to achieve what you want in life
- Compliment yourself often, realize your own greatness and give yourself permission to act like the great person that you are
- Learn to be in a relationship, because ultimately that’s an end goal. Do not be afraid to put yourself out there or to be vulnerable. The rewards outweigh the risk. Be the best person you can be, and bring out the best in whoever you’re with. If it comes to an end, realize that the pain is only temporary and that the good times had over a span of time were much more significant than the brief transition phase out of that relationship. By avoiding situations that can potentially cause pain, you are depriving yourself of some of the greatest experiences life has to offer.
- Be a one man show. Do not rely on others to be in a good, positive, outgoing state
- Learn to gain rapport and connect with people no matter how different they may be and what the circumstances are. Be true to who you are and be authentic, knowing that we’re all part of the same human race, with similar life stories and age old common themes on our journeys. We can all relate to one another on many different levels and connecting with another human being should be easy and natural. Put any guard or ego defense down and be authentic.
- Congruence comes with time in the field. There’s no other way to get congruence except by EARNING it so pay your dues and become an authentic, congruent person
- Go after what you want in this area and everywhere else in life letting go of any fear, regret, worries or excuses. Detach yourself from these emotions. You are not your mind, you are not your emotions. Your mind is a tool and your emotions are chemical reactions that you experience. Do not allow your identity to be intertwined with either.
- Obtain a large amount of firsthand experience immediately. Experience is what counts.
- Be selfless and start looking out for the interests of others. See how you can offer value to them in their lives and be supportive of their desires and emotions.
- Stop being critical and judgmental of others. This is a sign that you are in your head and insecure. Be positive and understanding of everyone always. Any negative perception you have of someone else is a direct reflection of how you feel about yourself. When you have your internal state handled, you have a positive self image, high self-esteem and you can identify with your ideal self, you will see the reflection of these positive traits when looking at others. When you criticize others and are negatively judgmental, you are only revealing your own internal insecurities and issues.
- Be happy and make this the most fun and exciting year of your life. Go out and make it happen. Travel any opportunity you get. Meet new people. Share all that you’ve learned and experienced with others. Be authentic. Take that internal state of happiness and positivity within you and share it with the world.
What am I happy about in my life now?
What am I excited about in my life now?
What am I proud about in my life now?
What am I grateful about in my life now?
What am I enjoying in my life right now?
What am I committed to in my life right now?
Who do I love? Who loves me?
“You had to give it to him: he had a plan. And it started to make sense, in a Tyler sort of way. No fear. No distractions. The ability to let that which does not matter truly slide.”
So there you have it. This document is unique in the sense that it’s not just a list of benchmark goals. Over the past few years you can clearly see the things I valued and what I’ve been working to accomplish. Reading this over I can see that some of the goals and words of wisdom don’t necessarily apply to me anymore. Some of this stuff is already completely handled and could potentially be removed from the list, although I do like to keep it there as a reminder every now and then.
Also, you’ll notice I’ve thrown in a few quotes that I find to be relevant to working towards your goals and staying motivated. Reading through these goals just now has also made me realize that I am in fact living them. So many of the things I’ve talked about doing, I’ve done over the last year. It just goes to show you, if you take time to write out your goals and keep them up to date, you’re subconscious mind will draw you towards the opportunities you need to make them a reality.
You have to have a vision for your life. You have to have a purpose. You must have something you dream of doing, achieving, putting together, and start moving your life in a direction to make that a reality. It takes time. Many of our dreams cannot be accomplished instantaneously. Like the old saying, Rome wasn’t built in a day. Your dreams and your ultimate vision will usually take years to achieve. But if you don’t have a plan and if you’re not on your path, you’ll never achieve a fulfilling life where your dreams become a reality.
And you don’t have to have everything planned out right now. My goals that I’ve shared are two years in the making and they’re still not clear cut. I’ve pulled different bits of information and wisdom from a lot of different sources in that document, but put them together in a way of my own, that means a lot to me personally. If you can take something from what I’ve shared and adapt it to your own purpose feel free to. At the very least I hope it gives you some inspiration or ideas of what you can do for yourself.
You know, the positive from me not writing anything in awhile is that I’ve got all sorts of ideas built up in my head and I could literally go all night, but I don’t want to over do it. I’ll save the rest for another day. Plus I’ve got another looooonng day of work ahead of me. Maybe next time I’ll talk about stress management!
So in conclusion; set some goals, find your purpose, find what you’d like to have in life but currently don’t, and make it happen for yourself. Make this the best year of your life, have fun, spend time with people who mean the most to you, do whatever it is you love to do, keep on growing, living, and becoming the person you want to be.