20 Points on How to Live a Happy, Fulfilling Life
I’ve taken a lot of time off from writing to focus on other things, but I realize how beneficial it was for me to get my thoughts down on paper in the past, so I’ve decided to put something new together today. I guess the best way to explain my most recent absence is, I finally broke out of a long term struggle and obtained the outcome I’d been searching for. While in the midst of that struggle I had a lot of determination, drive and emotion that fueled me to write passionately about whatever topic I was relating to at the time. Now that that particular struggle is over, I’ve been enjoying the fact that all the work and persistence paid off. A few months ago if you would have asked if I truly believed I’d accomplish my goal, I don’t know if I could have answered yes with complete certainty. I do know that I would have been able to tell you I was committed to working towards it however long it may take. And that answers over time guarantees the desired outcome. Enough of the background, I said today was going to be different so let’s get down to it. Instead of an elaborate reflection on life experience, self development and positivity, today I’m going to simply list out some valuable lessons and perspective. I hope that anyone reading can save this list and refer back to it whenever you need to come back into alignment with these lessons and values. On that note, let’s begin:
- Your life circumstances and the current situation you’re dealing with is the direct consequence of the decisions you’ve made, actions you’ve taken and the way you’ve chosen to spend your time. If there’s anything you don’t like about it, it’s your responsibility to change that.
- Learn to think for yourself. Learn what it means to think for yourself. Understand concept such as social conditioning and group think. Do you enjoy the things you believe that you enjoy because you truly connect with them, or is it because that’s what everyone else is concerned with and those things have been heavily marketed to society as a whole?
- Develop a sense of self awareness. Get outside your self absorbed thought loops and step outside yourself, figuratively speaking. Observe yourself in real time from an outside perspective and examine how irrational your emotions sometimes can be. Observe what trivial things you react to and begin to realize that all in all, everything is ok, and you can handle whatever situations that may arise.
- Develop self confidence. Have a belief in yourself completely independent of what anyone else may say or think. This means defining what matters to you and living your values. As long as you’re living in alignment with what matters to you, that’s all you’ll ever need.
- Question everything. Question your emotional response. If you react to something negatively ask yourself, why? Did something happen to you in the past? Are you being self conscious? Is there a subconscious belief you are unaware of that’s creating a negative emotional response that’s unfit, or too much for the reality of the situation?
- Determine what you want out of life to the greatest degree of detail you possibly can. Know what really matters, know what you want more than anything and put these things first. The longer you bring this into your awareness, the more evolved your vision will become and the more depth you will add as you gradually bring your dreams into reality.
- Don’t give in to temptations of taking the easy way out or avoiding a struggle in life because in the long run, these struggles are what build character. They are the best learning environment when it comes to life lessons and ultimately becoming a more centered person. People who have been through the greatest challenges and come out the other side are much more at ease and relaxed in life compared to those who’ve had everything come easy, living in an uncontested reality.
- Take time to recover and to relax your mind and body. Goals and drive are a beautiful thing, but to go the distance in life you need time to rest, rebuild, recover and reflect, in whatever form that may mean to you. Always keep your life in balance.
- Expect everything to go well and work out in your favor until it doesn’t. Always have positive expectations and confidence in what you are doing. When you’re right, you’ll reinforce that positive attitude. If you’re wrong, you’ll be provided an opportunity to face a challenge, adapt and prove you’ve got what it takes to handle whatever life brings your way.
- Get out of your head and be present to the moment. When you’re having a conversation actually listen to what the other person has to say instead of thinking about what you want to say next. Learn to let your great response or point go if the conversation happens to move past that particular subject. Break away from the endless thought impulses and looping ideas within your head and learn to just be in the moment, aware of your sensory perception with your mind shut off from time to time, and your consciousness brought into the now.
- Always be reading new books, not just random content on the internet, but actual books on whatever topics are of interest to you. Continuously grow and expand your knowledge. Learn about your health and well being, learn about the mind, learn about nutrition, learn ways to make money, how different things work, keep up on current events in politics, and not through the controlled media owned by the ultra wealthy with their own self serving agenda.
- Don’t be a spectator in life. Get involved. Reality is happening right before your eyes and you only get one shot at it. Instead of observing things as they pass you by, get involved, have a positive impact and influence things to create an outcome that you desire.
- Realize that you’re not going to live forever. And because one day you will no longer exist in this physical form, time is the only true scarce resource. Use it wisely and make the most of it. Cut out inefficient uses of your time that don’t serve to benefit you in any way (TV, aimlessly surfing the web). Could you be doing something more productive? Like, I don’t know, going to the gym, reading a book, working, doing a project around the house, getting involved within your community, participating in a hobby, finding a hobby, socializing, taking a walk, planning your week, meditating, doing something for someone else who could really use your assistance?
- Happiness is a choice. You can perceive events in a positive light, take things lightly, be flexible and adaptive, or you can choose to be miserable, view yourself as a victim, complain about every little thing that doesn’t go your way, believe things aren’t fair because you’re weak and not willing to do what it takes to get what you want out of life. Both constructs of reality exist before your eyes no matter what the circumstances are. The choice is yours and yours alone.
- Don’t be concerned with what other people think. What they think isn’t any of your business and you can never know for sure, you can only speculate. If you’ve worked on becoming your ideal self, living in alignment with the things that you value then no one should have an issue with you. If they do, that’s their problem and a reflection of their own internal issues they’ve yet to address.
- Realize the complexities of different issues. There are two sides to every story and there’s not always going to be a cut and dry right or wrong answer. Be understanding of both sides of an issue and realize it’s ok to hold two conflicting opinions, each being some level of correct and some level flawed. The mind is conditioned to choose an absolute answer. This is right, therefore that is wrong. Due to complexities and the oversimplification by the mind of every unique situation, sometimes our consciousness needs to have cognitive dissonance and be able to hold to conflicting views as correct in their own accord.
- Realize that language comes with limitations and inaccuracies built in. Every word is a label for some sort of sensory perception. Every word is an oversimplification of the reality that lies before us. We can’t waste time viewing everything as new and unique so we categorize, label and oversimplify. This allows us not to waste time being fascinated by every unique object, sound, taste, smell and texture we come in contact with. This doesn’t change the fact that all these things really are unique in their own way. Sometimes language imposes limitations to what we experience, how we feel, and puts a damper on our creativity. Be aware of these limitations and again, be present enough to experience things for what they are, not simply as a label imposed by the compulsive judgment of your mind.
- Life’s about the journey, the process, the experience to reach out into the world and bring about positive change. Any outcome, end goal, or dream you create in your head will never quite turn out the way you expected it to in your mind. Learn to enjoy the doing with little to no concern for any specific outcome. Outcomes come and go. Once achieved the victory is short lived and soon enough you’re at it again seeking the next level. It’s an endless trap so find something you enjoy doing that brings you fulfillment and keep doing it.
- Realize that there are no limits in life. Any limitations are self imposed and within your own head. They don’t exist in reality so rid yourself of any limiting beliefs. Once you remove these mental roadblocks you’re free to take action to bring about desired change. If you don’t believe in yourself, you’ll never take action so whatever fear based rationalizations you’re using to defeat yourself without even trying, eliminate them immediately.
- Love and respect yourself enough to get what you want out of life. You only live once. This is the only chance you’ll ever get so make it happen. Share that love with the rest of the world and give back in order to pull those around you up, as you advance on your own journey.
So there you have it; 20 points of advice on life in general. There’s a lot more to it than that, but like I said, I’d like for this to be a good reference and go to piece if you’re feeling down, frustrated, lacking motivation or any other time you need a reminder as to why you’re enduring the struggles you’ve undertaken in life. As always, feel free to comment or get in touch with me via facebook, twitter, email, it doesn’t matter. Thanks again for reading.